Featured

Welcome to my blog!

Greetings to all! 

I was not intending this first post to be at such a challenging and unprecedented time.  My hopes and prayers are that you, your family and friends remain healthy – physically and mentally.   

Let’s start with an explanation of the title.  I heard the words incompetent and martyrs together many years ago in reference to people disheartened by their church leadership.  Frustrated, some angry, they moved away from more sizable and unengaging practices of worship.  A smaller gathering formed, one said to harken back to earlier times of the same denomination.  They casually called themselves … the church of the Incompetent Martyrs. 

Something resonated … 

I grew up Catholic, felt drawn to a sense of spirituality and ritual.  Stability was found in practicing traditions that provided meaning and purpose.  Thoughts of priesthood arose during those younger years, an idea that was met with a great deal of enthusiasm amongst adults in my life.

That inkling surfaced at the end of high school, leading to a few years spent studying to be a priest.  I was fascinated with advanced aspects of theology, especially on the nature of God, creation, and seeing how it might tie in to astronomy and other branches of science.  Though eventually choosing another vocation, I never regretted the experience.  The Catholic church, along with the seminary education, has been and remains an integral part of who I am.

Yet frustration grew …

It started in the seminary.  Clericalism present, a self-absorbed, superior attitude amongst some who were eventually ordained.  Adherence to propagated traditions seemed to take priority over helping others to discover what was already written in their hearts.  The sexual abuse scandal and the reaction of the hierarchy intensified discouragement.  I found myself adrift from original roots, moored to a singular faith in the Divine.

A close friend introduced me to the works of spiritual writer Fr. Richard Rohr.  Reflecting on the daily meditations of the Franciscan, a different perspective arose.  Like converging pieces of a puzzle coming together.  Not a new revelation, but a rethinking of foundational theological roots.      

A cathartic creativity arose along the journey.  Writing found expression in a novel using the same title, Incompetent Martyrs.  Incompetent in the story relates to our initial naïveté growing up, leading to influences on true freedom that negatively impact future decisions … And what ends up being martyred is one’s true essence.  The narrative contains aspects of young love and shattered dreams, idealistic views turned inside out, misguided values and abuse, calamitous loss, passion and broken vows, a contracted murder, and the uncovering of a secret archive created to protect an institution.  A spiritual awakening finally emerges for the protagonist, who once gave up the love of a woman to be a priest.  In the end, it leads to a unique crossroad … Incompetent Martyrs is available at Amazon.com.  Please check it out.  Feedback would be appreciated!

Further posts intend to unpack life experiences, those touched on in the story and others; past influences and decisions, institutional religion, and our human quest to understand origins and purpose.  We all have a unique perspective and my desire is to engage in that dialogue.

Be safe.

Peterson

…True commitment is not a decision at one point in time.  It’s a willingness to be part of the journey (excerpt from Incompetent Martyrs)

~ Peterson O’Rourke

Our Gift

The advent season ends, and we move into the celebration of Christmas … a celebration that abruptly ends for many on December 26, with hastily discarded trees lining front curbs or tossed on wood piles.  I like to take it slow, to savor…  to reflect on this event.

Each year seems to bring a deeper meaning of life, while the vastness of the mystery of God grows.  Yet there is a comfortable peace in the mystery that has formed a personal creed…

I believe in a benevolent God… The inherent goodness of all… That our relationship with God is one of complete love… and NOT transactional.  And, as Sr. Peg Dolan said, each of us is a word of God spoken only once.

A Reality of the Passion

Jesus never said…Come worship me.  He said…Come follow me.

As Christians around the world reflect on this day, it seems easier to consider the events of Good Friday as something that happened over two-thousand years ago.  Not as a reality within our daily lives.

Yet it is there.  We experience heartache, disappointment, tragedy, personal injury, loss of loved ones.  And instead of seeing difficulties as sharing in a mystery that remains beyond our comprehension, we look to blame, become bitter, turn on others.  Maybe pain leads us to despair.

With our own scourgings, crowns of thorns, nails being driven into our hands and feet… Do we have the courage to accept, to forgive?  Can we find deeper meaning?  Can we trust the promise that is part of the call… Come follow me.

Painting by Linda Lepeirs

Elusive Peace

I was moved by two very different stories recently.  One involved the niece of a close friend.  The other is presently being splashed across the news.  The former dealt with inner turmoil.  Looking for peace. To be accepted by others.  Much of the struggle seems to revolve around the importance of accepting yourself.

The daily tragedy being unleashed on the world stage in Ukraine deals with this same issue of peace.  As different as the two situations may be, a similarity exists at the core.  Thich Nhat Hanh stated … How do you want to create peace, if there is no peace inside yourselves?

Pray for peace…

Christmas Simplicity

My wife and I headed north for Christmas to spend time with family and friends in Utah.  The route selected took into consideration travel conditions and my desire to see the snow that had fallen in a recent storm.  The one overnight stop destination was the small community of Kanab, Utah.  The quaint town had the charm I anticipated, and we arrived early enough to enjoy a meal at the Rocky V Cafe (I recommend) and drive through neighborhoods as Christmas lights were coming on.  

Light research led me to one meaning of the name Kanab, coming from a Native American word…a willow basket used to carry an infant on its mother’s back.  It brought to mind the simplicity of the Christmas manger scene.  The thought continued the next morning heading north on State Route 89.  It was like driving through a Christmas card.  Snow layering small communities and older homesteads with smoke rising easily from chimneys.  

The journey was a chance to reflect on the simple, yet profound meaning of that first Christmas.  God coming, dwelling among us…
There is a quote from Eckhart Tolle that I believe points to a deeper and more profound meaning of the message of Christmas…  You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you, and allowing that goodness to emerge.

The Most Important Gift

Always interesting to find out how other countries and cultures celebrate particular holidays held in common.  I ran across a story on how Christmas is celebrated in one particular area.

A man in a very poor area of Poland was asked about Christmas traditions.  He related that no gifts were exchanged.  The simple celebration was getting together with family for a meal, followed by singing of Christmas carols.

Despite the lack of means for this man and his family, there is an underlying simplicity that reflects the true meaning of Christmas … Gathering of family … celebrating with songs.

With our overly commercialized concept of Christmas we have the tendency to forget the true gift of Christmas … A Presence.  Not presents.  Jesus brought a message that was expressed in more than just words.  As we move toward this Christmas holiday, let us remember the true gift of Christmas and share that message by how we live.

A Thanksgiving Thought

Thanksgiving is the beginning of the holiday season filled with joy and happiness … Good food and spending time with family and friends.  For others, it’s a sadder time.   Some people see their lives filled with abundant blessings and find thankfulness easy and natural.  Others are preoccupied with making ends meet or tending to past wounds that impact one’s ability to be grateful.

Regardless of how you feel, approach this Holiday Season with a commitment to give yourself and others the gift of gratitude.  Sincerely thank others for something they did or for the role they play in your life.  Making others feel good by expressing gratitude is a powerful gift.  It costs so little and means so much.  Just putting appreciation into words can make someone’s day, or even change a life … That includes our own.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Returning Home

You can never go back …  They say that about returning home.  On a recent trip I went back to the neighborhood where I was raised.  The old house looked different.  Smaller.  The front yard had changed.  Weeds I pulled as a kid were out of control.  Bushes I carefully trimmed were gone.   Passing other homes, many houses were dilapidated now, the street empty of activity.  Family names came to mind, along with memories of long afternoon’s at play.

The school and church attended were just minutes away.  We used to have unlimited access to school grounds.  Movement was restricted now by security fencing.  Even the church was securely locked.  But I was able to peer through fencing, the school courtyard bordered by classrooms igniting a reflection on those past years.  Those images became foundational elements in the first part of my novel Incompetent Martyrs … Part I:  Innocence.

Interesting how innocence is couched … a carefree time … free of worry, of responsibility.  But it cannot be forever.  As  William Butler Yeats reminded us …The innocent and beautiful have no enemy but time.  We can prepare the young for the inevitable transition.  A balance between guidance and control.  Sharing wisdom and avoiding personal bias.  But transitions, like birth, are never without struggle and pain…

Life and Love

There is an odd feeling when parents have passed on.  It’s a point in life when you are now the older generation.  Most of life is in the rearview mirror and you may find yourself spending time looking at the reflection of what was.

My parents’ generation certainly had a different perspective when it came to God and religion.  Rules and regulations were important.  Meant to be followed.  A guide to perfection.  Pleasing  and desired by a judgmental divine being.  Unfortunately, institutional religion was a strong source of that concept.

Hopefully, with the passing of each generation, we grow in perspective … about God, about reality, about relationships.  As seen in a quote I spotted the other day…


Life is not perfect … and love doesn’t care.

Doing Unto Others

Last week my wife and I were strolling along a sidewalk.  A few yards in front of us a woman sat on a bench cradling her baby.  The pacifier in the child’s mouth fell out and landed on the ground in an awkward position for the mother to retrieve.  My wife went quickly over to assist, a surprised look of gratitude appearing on the woman’s face.

Fifteen hours later we were on another city sidewalk making our way to a restaurant for dinner.  Hand-in-hand, I suddenly felt her drop alongside me.  She had slipped on a metal grate and ended up on her hands and knees.  Fortunately, no serious injuries.  A couple of bruised knees and a bit shocked from the sudden jolt.  I managed to help her up as others continued to walk around us.  It was not until sitting down for dinner that a realization hit.  Nobody … Not one person paused to assist … or even bothered to ask if she was okay.

In this present world of turmoil and strife … of political upheaval and unrest … of pointing fingers to blame others for situations and woes … we have missed a major point of our very existence.  We have become too individualistic.  Selfish.  Concerned only for what is in it for me.  We have missed the point that we are meant to be in relationship.  To reach out to others.  To be concerned for others … to LOVE.

And for those in the political realm who feel they can solve all the world’s problems with another law … another protest … another program … or some educational initiative … You cannot legislate virtue.